Skeptics, please don’t read this.

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After Mark died last year I went to see a Medium. Like I said, if you are a skeptic you might want to click off here and go read a news blog or something. Oddly, how I got to this person was by way of woman who said she was going because “I’m skeptical and I don’t believe all that stuff.”

Really I thought, “you, who besides being skeptical is also someone who could give the woman who writes the “Tightwads Gazette” a run for her very carefully spent money. Why would you do that? Why spend the money?”

Apparently she wanted to prove that her best friend had been wasting her time and money going to see this person.  In other words to make her wrong.

I, on the other hand was eager to meet this guy, and as it happened he was right in the next town. It took a lot of finagling on my part to get the name out of the skeptical woman. I guess she was protecting me from myself. Or maybe she was just being stingy which is one of her most outstanding qualities.

As you may have guessed, she and I do not like each other even though our husbands were friends for over 40 years. I avoided being with her and I think the feeling was mutual.

After much cajoling I was able to get the name from her and made an appointment. It was October and the earliest appointment I was able to get was end of January.

And then providence stepped in. A phone call came from the Medium’s scheduler a cancellation came in for just 6 days before my birthday in November. Did I want it?

Now just so you know when the appointment is made the only question the scheduler asks is first name and phone number. Period. Nothing more. While on the phone the scheduler gives me the cancellation policy and lets me know I must confirm 24 hours in advance. So if you are thinking about how Mediums probably spend their days Googling all your information in advance, that is not the case.

And if you are one of those people why are you still reading?

I would like to tell you that I plan to share my entire one hour session with Glenn but no I am not though he did give me a CD of the session and I did video our conversation. It took me six months before I listened to it again it was so powerful and overwhelming.

I can tell you that all of the things he said there was no way he could have known unless Mark told him. One thing that I will share was this-after he said that Mark walked in with me (he asked, did he just pass?” At that time it was just two months)

At one point he was wondering,  “Why am I getting the image for the cartoon character Dora the Explorer, Dora the Explorer? My son used to watch her on PBS you know who she is?”

I laughed.” That is my mother in law’s name”, I said.

He said, “She’s still on this side, but starting to lose it a bit?”

Then he said this, “Mark is saying that if she says that I have been to see her, I have and I will be.”

On the day after he died, my mother in-law said that she had “such a nice visit with Mark last night.”  She never knew he was sick, never knew he died we made that decision from day one to spare her worry. Dora was a worrier.

Two weeks after my session with Glenn my mother -in-law went into a coma and died. I am guessing that Mark was telling her “Hey lady come on now, time to leave. Let’s go” She was 93 and starting to fall apart. What better way to go with your son whispering in your ear?

Going to see Glenn was a great gift I gave myself.

Mark came through even though he said to Glenn, “I don’t believe in this sh*t I am doing this for her.” Glenn said “Mark is someone I would really like to be friends with, ” and I said, “Well you can be.”

Mark was fine, no more suffering just free like a bird. Glenn said he was happy.   Mark  said some things that he remembered about his last hours and repeated the same words he said to me the day before he died, “I love you, be happy, have a great life and please get some sleep.” There was much more but it’s personal.

So what does that mean to the skeptics?  As Glenn said, “Why would anyone waste their money to prove me wrong? Go buy a pair of shoes instead.”

As for me, if your heart is broken, like mine was, seeing a genuine Medium can be a good thing to do.

(I would avoid the street fortune tellers that dot every corner in NYC)

When I left that November day, I was glad to know Mark was okay and that I would be too someday and that he is with me even though I cannot see him, he is in my heart and I know he is watching over me. Funny things do happen that I can only say that somehow Mark orchestrated them. And if that is the case I am good with that no matter what anyone else may think.

Glenn said, “He is not up there, not down there, but right here in another realm. Who he was on this side is who he is on the other. You have a great guy right by your side.”

Yep I know.

After loss finding my life

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This isn’t the most flattering photo of Mark yet I love it because it is so very Mark.  He WOULD be the one to climb up on a  tower after hiking up a steep slope. Taken near Woodstock 16 plus years ago on a crisp fall day.

I have spent the past year trying to find my life. Married to Mark for 26 years and living with him for close to 30, I can tell you as he would say, “It ain’t easy.”  Before he left this earth he made me promise to “enjoy your life, be happy,” I remember looking in his gaunt face, his golden brown eyes, me choking back the tears, sniffling and pawing at him still strong but very skinny arms begging for the impossible. A miracle. We had all our miracles. Time was up. Game over.  No more hikes in the woods, walks on the beach, getting lost on purpose, no more skating, no more dancing. Oh the dancing . We danced everywhere from the Rainbow Room to our Living room.

And right then as I sat there holding his hand clinging to him,  a song came on my iPhone,  via Pandora, Maroon 5-“Moves Like Jagger”.

Something miraculous happened, though not surprising. Mark rose-waving off any offer of assistance and looked me in the eyes, smiled and whispered in my ear, ” Last dance?”  We danced one more Hustle, one more Lindy, one more booty shaking dance- just one more time.

Mark danced with gusto with all the energy he could muster.  He was  weak, he was dying. But Mark was a powerhouse.  One of his many nicknames was Mr. Mighty. And in that moment he was indeed Mr. Mighty.  Mark  wasn’t one to pass up a chance to climb a tower, dance a dance, learn a new skating move or give up even when the time had come to let go.

Mark savored life. I miss how when we were together we would take an ordinary day and make it special. Sometimes I step, sometimes I stumble but each day I take him with me and find the joy and count my blessings for all that he gave me.

Stay tuned hon.

Go ahead and break those balloons

The life you save may be your own. And the whales and other giant sea creatures who ingest your “happy 40th birthday” balloons
Save the whales people❤❤

Do this: after the party is over-
1. Pop all balloons especially if you are lucky enough to have a party at the beach.
Pick up the popped balloons and please toss them in the trash.
You will be doing such a good thing for all.

Hot town summer

Is this a poem?

So  far from what I can tell.

This is the sizzling
summer of the hot and the buggy.
(Who you calling buggy?)
It’s been…
Muggy.
Yuggee.

I mean yucky.

Okay so.

Let it go.
Imagine snow?
Live in possibility.

I am the possibility of Jo’ie de Vivre

(Francaise for joy in life thanks France for that)
July 14, 2012
Nancy in New York

FancyNancy and Magic Mark on the boardwalk.

on
Bastille Day.

For you. Miracle Makers. Happy New Year 2012


Tiny Prints Snapshot

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Frozen Banana Sorbet

When my niece Sarabeth came to visit from San Francisco she shared this delicious easy treat.
It’s from Aunt Eileen and works especially well if you happen to have a banana shaped dish like this one from Pier One Imports. But that is not necessary.

Take a banana and mash it thoroughly.
Press the banana into a freezer safe cup or bowl.
Put the cup into freezer until frozen.
Remove bowl from freezer.
Turn bowl over and run hot water over the bottom so the banana pulls away from the bowl.
Eat and enjoy.
Optional add: hot fudge sauce or whipped cream or peanut butter.

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